Can't buy me love
by kchandler0
Summary: Story based on the 1987 movie Can't Buy Me Love, starring the teenage Ross and Rachel. Basically, Ross pays Rachel to date him for a month.
1. Chapter 1

**As I said in the description, this story is based on the movie. Some things I had to change because of the characters and some things I changed just to make the story a little different. **

* * *

><p>Ross wiped the sweat from his brow. It was an unusually hot day for early September. The girls in the pool shouted as they leapt up and down in the clear water. They inadvertently splashed him. Rachel, his sister Monica, and two girls from Rachel's cheerleading squad. Ross could never remember their names. Mrs. Greene had said that he could swim in the pool any time he wanted, in exchange for the work he'd done over the summer cleaning it, not to mention mowing the lawn. Ross had been saving up for a giant Supersaurus dinosaur model kit, and he almost had the thousand dollars he needed.<p>

But Ross would've done the work for nothing because it meant being around Rachel. Rachel. Ever since ninth grade typing class (eighth grade for her), Ross had been tracking her every move. If only Mr. Carew hadn't assigned seats alphabetically. Ross wouldn't have had to sit right next to Rachel and she wouldn't have smiled at him when Joe Alexander made fun of the teacher behind his back. Although Rachel had been hanging around with his sister Monica for almost as long as he could remember, that was the first time he really saw her.

The only problem was that she hadn't seen him yet. It had been three years since that fateful day, and Rachel still walked around as if Ross didn't exist, only occasionally giving him a monosyllable or a treasured glance. And the boys. There were always other boys. Rachel was one of the most popular girls in school. Right now she was going out with Scott Lucas. The only good thing about Scott was that he was away at college.

Ross's thoughts were interrupted by a large shadow suddenly blocking his sunlight. Oh, it was only Monica.

"Rachel wants to know if you want to swim," Monica said, dripping on him.

"She does?" Ross knocked over the lawn chair he'd been lying on as he stumbled to his feet. What could this mean?

"Yeah, we're going inside. You have the pool all to yourself," Monica playfully wrung out her swim shirt in Ross's face as she spoke.

Ross grumbled to himself as he watched the girls giggling their way into the Greene's sizable home. He sighed, took a deep breath and dove in.

* * *

><p>Mrs. Greene met Rachel and her friends at the back door. "Rachel, I just got the credit card bill and I don't think Daddy will be very happy. I think you went overboard with your back-to-school shopping. It might be nice if you learned to work for some of your things, like Monica's brother out there." She gestured toward the pool.<p>

The girls all burst into laughter, though it wasn't clear if it was over the notion of Rachel being forced to work or having Ross held up as an example. Mrs. Greene finally laughed too. She loved being around her daughter and her friends. It made her feel young again.

While Monica, Linda and Tammy filed up to her room, Rachel pulled her mother aside. "Mom, any letters for me yet?" she asked in a whisper. She didn't want Linda or Tammy to know that Scott hadn't called or written at all this summer. She and the other girls on the cheer squad were always trying to one up each other, making snide remarks and then laughing them off as a joke. Maybe the other girls were right. If she'd gone all the way with him, he'd definitely be writing.

Mrs. Greene looked sympathetic. "None yet, dear."

"Come on, Rachel," Monica called from upstairs. She didn't feel comfortable being around Rachel's other friends for too long. She said they made fun of her when Rachel wasn't around. Monica wasn't very popular and she had a weight problem. She was always going on some diet, but they never seemed to work. She loved food too much. Cooking it, talking about it, but especially eating it. Rachel and Monica had been best friends since the first grade, though, and nothing was going to change that.

Rachel grimly climbed the stairs to her room, hoping the girls wouldn't bring up Scott.

* * *

><p>Ross sneaked up the corridor on the way to sixth period the next day at school.<p>

"Hey dork, looking for us?" he heard a familiar voice call. Bruce and Craig. Two friends of Rachel's. Two of the cool guys, of course. They always waited for him by the stairwell and chased him into the boys' room. Ross sprinted off in the opposite direction, but Bruce caught him by the back of his shirt and pulled him into the restroom.

"Maybe you'll find some dinosaurs down here," Bruce said, holding Ross face down in a toilet as Craig flushed. The boys ran off laughing. Ross sighed. Just another day as Lincoln High's resident science geek.

Later that day Ross sat on the empty bleachers watching the cheerleaders practice. Rachel was front and center, jumping up in the air and bringing her legs apart. Ross marveled at how she could do it. This was the best part of his day, though that wasn't saying much. After being dumped on again by Bruce and Craig, Ross had been tripped in the hall by a freshman.

Ross first felt rather than saw his friend Will as he joined him on the bleachers. The stadium shook slightly as the large boy took his place next to Ross.

"Still dreaming about HER, huh?," Will jeered at him.

"I don't know. Maybe," Ross mumbled. He knew Will's feelings about Rachel, and vice versa. Ever since last semester they'd had a cruel back and forth going. Will made fun of Rachel's oversized nose and Rachel tormented Will about his weight. He couldn't figure out how a girl who was so nice to his overweight sister could be so mean to someone else with the same problem, but then Monica was a friend.

"I have an idea. Know how the jocks and hot shots have all these clubs? Let's make our own club. The I Hate Rachel Greene Club." Will smiled, satisfied with himself.

"Why would I want to be in a club like that?" Ross questioned, "and anyway, isn't that sort of...elementary? I'll bet you couldn't even get anyone to join. Everyone loves Rachel." Ross couldn't stop the small smile from forming on his lips.

Will rolled his eyes. "That's where you're wrong. I already got us one other member. That foreign exchange student from Thailand."

"But he doesn't even understand English," Ross protested, "Is it really fair to..." His words trailed off as he saw Rachel approaching the front of the bleachers, her hair darker in some places where she was sweating.

Ross jumped up, knocking his Economics book over. "Hi, Rach," he called out joyfully. His face reddened as he heard the titters from the other cheerleaders. Rachel picked up her water bottle and walked back over to the group as if she hadn't heard him. Ross slouched down dejectedly.

Will grinned. "Ready to reconsider that club membership now?" Without waiting for an answer, he went on. "I say we start a rumor. Not just any rumor, like 'Rachel has a big nose' - everybody knows that. We need something that'll really kill her..."

Ross stared at his feet as Will droned on.

* * *

><p>"Time, I've been passing time watching trains go by," Mr. Geller sang loudly as he sprinkled cheese on an unbaked pizza.<p>

"Daaad, do you have to sing?," Monica groaned. Their father was an entrepreneur. His most recent foray into the business world was a combination pizza delivery and VHS rental service. He called it the wave of the future. Customers ordered their pizza and picked out a movie to rent at the same time. Both items were delivered in Mr. Geller's new-to-him '74 station wagon with "Jack's Pizza and Movies To Go" painted on the side of it. In keeping with the movie theme, the car's horn played the first eight notes of Time of My Life from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack each time you honked it. Mr. Geller had promised Ross he could borrow the car whenever he wanted.

"I guess you weren't invited to the party tonight," Monica said suddenly.

"What party?" Ross asked, sliding a pizza into a box.

Monica smirked. "I thought so."

"You're only invited to these things because of Rachel," Ross shot back.

"Now, now kids. I won't have any fighting," their father stepped in. "Ross, you're always welcome to play bridge with your mother and I after dinner."

"Gee thanks, Dad," Ross said glumly. Not for the first time, he wondered what it would be like to be popular.

* * *

><p>Rachel eyed her mother's ring, so beautiful and sparkly. It was just the kind of present she would've gotten from Scott, if she'd followed the other girls' advice. Linda had asked about Scott today. She had to do something, offer some kind of proof that they were still together. If she admitted that that Scott had forgotten her, her friends would give her some patronizing speech about how it was too bad Rachel might have to go to prom alone and then look smugly at each other.<p>

Rachel's parents were attending a high class charity function tonight, but maybe her mother wouldn't wear her ring. It cost a thousand dollars, after all. What if something happened to it? Rachel's mother often said she loved that ring more than she loved her father.

"Goodnight girls," Mr. Greene called to his daughters.

"Enjoy your party, Rachel," Mrs. Greene put in.

After making sure that her sisters Jill and Amy were otherwise occupied, Rachel crept into her parents room and took the ring. She was only borrowing it, after all. No one would have to know.

* * *

><p>Music blared from someone's stereo into the dimly lit room. Rachel could barely see the girls crowded around her as they exclaimed over the ring. "Scotty mailed it to me today," Rachel said breathlessly. The ring sparkled in the darkness.<p>

"Ooooh, is it an engagement ring? Might we hear wedding bells in the future?," Tammy said half-jokingly. Rachel caught her wink at the other girls.

"Of course not," she said indignantly. Tammy knew very well Rachel was not going to get married until she was at least twenty.

"Funny you didn't mention the ring when we talked on the phone earlier," Linda said as she twirled a strand of hair around her finger, trying to sound innocent.

"The mail hadn't run yet," Rachel sniffed. She turned away from the group, but not before she heard their snickers.

Monica walked toward Rachel. "I think it's a nice ring, no matter where it came from." Great. Not even Monica believed her.

"Thanks, Mon. It's actually my mother's ring, but don't tell anyone." She couldn't keep secrets from her best friend.

"I sort of figured that," Monica said.

Suddenly a commotion in the kitchen broke out. "Chip threw up! It's everywhere," someone called out.

"Want to go see if they need some help cleaning up?" Monica asked eagerly. It didn't sound too appealing to Rachel. Unlike Monica, she didn't even like cleaning up after _herself_. But anything was better than standing around watching the whole Lincoln High cheerleading squad whisper about her.

"Make way. Coming through, coming through," Monica was saying, pushing her way through the crowd. Rachel followed her reluctantly. There was, indeed, vomit all over the kitchen sink. Monica dug through the kitchen cabinets before producing two sponges. Handing one to Rachel, she quickly went to work.

Rachel looked at her hands. There was no way she was wiping up this mess. For one thing, she was wearing a very expensive ring! Stalling, she slowly slipped the ring off her finger and pretended to look for a clean spot on the cabinet to place it. She saw Chip coming her way.

"Some party, eh Rach?," he slurred, obviously drunk.

"Yeah, just great," Rachel said sarcastically. Then her demeanor changed. "I can't wait for the next school dance, though. Are you going with anyone?" Maybe Chip would ask her and she could forget about Scott. Just then Monica turned on the garbage disposal, making it hard to hear.

Chip leaned forward as if he were going to answer. He looked a little queasy. Afraid he was going to give a repeat performance, Rachel quickly backed up. Forgetting she was still holding the ring, she let it drop. Rachel watched in horror as it clattered into the sink, spun around on the surface and fell into the garbage disposal. As a horrible crunching noise filled the air, Rachel had one thought: How was she going to get a thousand dollars to replace the ring?


	2. Chapter 2

Finally! The day had come at last. After a whole summer of mowing lawns, cleaning pools, and delivering pizzas for his father, Ross now had enough to buy the latest, state of the art model of one of the newest types of dinosaurs to be discovered: the Supersaurus. His parents thought it was a stupid thing to spend a thousand dollars on, but Ross didn't care.

He made his way through the crowded mall toward the hobby shop, hoping he wouldn't see anyone from school who would harass him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Rachel across the way going the opposite direction. She was alone, which was unusual. She always went to the mall with a group of friends. Ross would know. He often came here and followed them around at a safe distance, wishing he could be a part of their crowd.

But today she was by herself. Head down, steps purposeful. She went into an expensive jewelry store. Ross could guess why. His sister had let it slip last night what had happened at the party. That wasn't his concern today, though. Nothing could distract him from his mission. He turned in at Rob's Science Emporium, which happened to be directly across from the store Rachel was in. Ross couldn't help glancing over just one time. Rachel seemed to be arguing with a store clerk. Not his problem, Ross told himself again. Especially not now that he was a member of the I Hate Rachel club. Ross felt a pang of guilt thinking about that. Will had him helping to spread a rumor that Rachel had the sex organs of both genders. This involved Ross's making anonymous phone calls relaying the information to every student and faculty member at Lincoln High. He shouldn't feel guilty, he told himself. It was partly her own fault. If she'd only paid attention to him he would never have gone along with it.

"Ross Geller. I have a package reserved," he told a store employee now as he watched Rachel slump out of the jewelry store. Ross's eyes widened. She was crying.

"Just...wait a minute. I'll be back," he hurriedly told the man. Without thinking about it, he rushed across the mall floor, barely hearing the exclaims of "hey, watch out" as he bumped into a group of teenagers and a lady pushing a baby in a stroller.

"Rachel, what's wrong?," he asked breathlessly as he stood in front of her, forgetting to be nervous for once.

"What are _you_ doing here? Spying on me again?," Rachel asked. So he hadn't been at such a safe distance after all.

Ross squirmed. "No...I just came here to pick up a new dinosaur kit. I saw you crying and I just wondered..."

"Never mind," Rachel waved off his explanation. "It's just that I damaged my mother's favorite ring and I'll probably be grounded for life. Unless I come up with a thousand dollars to replace it, and that doesn't seem too likely."

Ross fingered the tightly wrapped bills in his pocket. "Can't you just use your father's credit cards?"

"No, my parents took them away from me for two weeks. It's hopeless." Rachel wiped at the tears that were still streaming down her face.

No. No matter how sad she looked, Ross was _not _going to give her his money. No matter how grateful she would be. Unless. No, the idea was too crazy to even think about. But what if Rachel had to give him something in return for all that money? Something like her time and attention. If he could get her to date him for say, a month, maybe she would even fall in love with him. And being seen around campus with Rachel Greene couldn't hurt his reputation either.

All thoughts of Supersaurus and the I Hate Rachel club forgotten, Ross took the plunge. "Well, it just so happens I could help you," he said in the fake cocky voice he used on the rare occasions he had the upper hand over somebody.

Rachel looked up slowly. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that I have a thousand dollars. But I'm not just going to give it away. Here's the deal. You promise to go out with me for one month and the money's yours," Ross gulped, suddenly not feeling so confident now that the words were out.

Rachel was stunned. "Are you crazy? Why would you want to _pay _someone to go out with you?"

"You don't know what it's like being a nerd," Ross felt his voice crack as he spoke. He cleared his throat and went on. "If I'm seen dating you maybe I'll become popular too." He didn't add the maybe falling in love part.

"Dating me is _not_ going to make you popular," Rachel said, shaking her head as if she felt sorry for him.

"That's my chance to take. Is it a deal or not?" This was the most Rachel had spoken to him in years, and he was enjoying himself.

Rachel took the damaged ring out of its box and looked at it for a moment. She'd gotten it out of the garbage disposal, but it was still broken beyond repair. No more parties, friends, the mall, or anything fun for however long her parents grounded her for. Hanging out with Ross for a month couldn't be _that_ bad.

"It's a deal," she said quickly before she could change her mind. She offered her hand and Ross shook it.

* * *

><p>"I'm in Rachel Greene's room," Ross kept repeating to himself. It was a nice room, decorated more simply than he'd imagined, with lots of pink and purple and rock star posters. He'd dreamt of this moment for three years, but in all his fantasies, it'd never been quite like this. He was sitting at Rachel's vanity looking in the mirror while she combed through his hair. Rachel had decided that before he was to appear as her boyfriend, Ross was in desperate need of a makeover.<p>

"No one wears their hair like this anymore. We have to do something about it," she set down the comb and stared at his reflection in the mirror.

Ross blushed under her intense gaze. "I don't _wear_ it any way. It's just my hair," he defended himself. His hair just naturally bushed out after it got to a certain length. He wasn't trying to make any weird fashion statement.

"That's the problem. You don't try to look your best," Rachel sighed and rifled through a drawer. Her hand emerged holding a pair of scissors. "Mind if I try cutting it a little?"

Ross eyed the scissors suspiciously. "What do you know about cutting hair?"

Rachel shrugged. "I used to practice on my dolls all the time...C'mon, just let me try."

Ross considered. His main goal in this whole crazy scheme had been to get Rachel to like him. He wouldn't get anywhere by arguing with her. And hair was just hair. It grew back.

* * *

><p>An hour later half the hair on his head was gone, scattered haphazardly on Rachel's purple carpeting. He had to admit he looked better.<p>

"Better?" Rachel squealed, "You look great! I'm a genius! I just wish we could afford to buy you new clothes...You could be almost cool!"

Ross noticed that there were several sections of hair that were uneven and his short bangs were somewhat crooked, but he figured his mother could straighten it all out when he got home. It was nice hearing Rachel compliment him like that. But then she said something that took that good feeling away.

"We need to make some rules for this thing now," Rachel sat on her bed as Ross twisted around in his chair.

"What kind of rules?"

Rachel laid sideways on the bed and lazily kicked one of her legs in the air. Ross watched, in a trance. "No kissing and no hand holding." Ross looked away, both embarrassed and disappointed. "Look, I know you have a little crush on me." The color drained out of Ross's face as Rachel spoke. He quickly looked down at his feet. "So I want to make it clear that we're dating for show only. Got it?"

Ross was getting angry. "Don't worry. I won't touch you," he grumbled. He jumped up and headed out the door. "Just don't forget to meet me tomorrow."

* * *

><p>Ross had never been so excited to get to school before. Despite Rachel's misgivings and her warning not to get too close to her, she was still going to be his girlfriend for a whole month. It's what he had wanted for so long, wasn't it? So what if it had cost him a thousand dollars and the chance to compete in the National Young Model Builders Competition. If it all turned out how he hoped it would, the loss would be well worth it.<p>

It was almost time for the bell to ring and Rachel still hadn't shown up. He'd been waiting by the tree in the schoolyard where they'd agreed to meet for fifteen minutes. What if she was backing out of their deal? He hadn't considered that that might happen.

Just then he saw Will approaching him carrying a stack of papers. "Hey Ross," he called when he got closer. He nodded down at the papers in his hands. "The next phase of our plan. We distribute these all over the school."

Ross didn't have to guess what the papers said. Will was pretty proud of himself for making up this duel gender rumor about Rachel and lately it was all he could talk about. If Rachel wasn't going to hold up her end of the bargain, he would be happy to help Will carry out his plan.

Ross looked around to make sure no one was paying attention to them. As usual, no one was. The few people still out in the school yard were busy chaining their bikes or trying to sneak a smoke before first period. Ross grabbed half the flyers and stuffed them in his backpack.

But as he finished zipping his bag and looked up, he realized he'd acted too soon. Rachel was heading in his direction, hair blowing in the breeze, leaves swirling at her feet. Ross stared at her and the wind buzzing in his ears suddenly became a song. 'Do I have to tell the story of a thousand rainy days since we first met/It's a big enough umbrella but it's always me that ends up getting wet/Every little thing she does is magic...'

"Ross, did you hear me?" Rachel snapped him out of his daydreaming. "I said I'm sorry I'm late. My sisters were hogging the bathroom." She grinned when she saw Ross was with Will Colbert. "How are you, Lard Butt?"

Will huffed a little, a pained expression on his face. "You're pathetic," he mumbled to Ross before he walked off quickly.

"You hurt his feelings sometimes, you know," Ross rebuked gently after a brief silence.

"Oh, we just like to fool around with each other. He doesn't take me seriously," Rachel insisted. She seemed to really believe that, and Ross wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing.

Ross decided to let it drop for now. "Well, shall we?," he asked, offering Rachel his arm.

Rachel laughed. Ross was certainly nothing like any boy she had dated before, but she accepted his outstretched arm and they made their way into the school.

* * *

><p>As the pair entered the big double doors at the entrance of Lincoln High, the world seemed to stop. Jaws dropped open in surprise as locker doors slammed shut amid the general hubbub of the beginning of a school day. What was the most popular girl in school doing with one of the biggest geeks?<p>

Tammy, her frizzy hair flying after her, rushed forward. "What are you doing with Whatsherface's brother? This is for a school project, right?"

Rachel tentatively unhooked her arm from Ross's. Should she tell her friend about the deal? No, that wouldn't be fair to Ross, and besides, the story didn't exactly make her look very good either.

"No, it's real. Ross and I are going out. Now if you'll excuse us," she said, pushing through a crowd that had formed around them.

Linda came up to Tammy. "Wow, what's _she_ smoking? Could you imagine having to kiss someone like him? Like, gag me with a spoon!"

Walking down the hall, Ross nervously watched as Bruce and Craig made their way towards them. They were always together. Ross sometimes wondered if they would lose some of their power if they were ever apart. Right now, though, he was only worried about being hassled on the day that was supposed to be a new beginning for him. He was turning over a new leaf, and he wanted respect to go along with his newfound status.

To his amazement, Craig clapped him on the back. "Way to go, man. I heard the good...well, the _weird_ news just now." Ross marveled at how fast rumors traveled at school. Well, hopefully not _all_ rumors, he thought, remembering the one he was supposed to help Will spread.

"Congratulations, Ross," Rachel said wryly once Craig and Bruce were out of earshot. "It doesn't matter how the girls reacted. If Craig is impressed with you, you're in."

Ross smiled to himself. He didn't have to ask what "in" meant. It meant he was part of the cool group now, or well on his way to being. No more suffering the taunts of bullies all day and no more dateless nights. Ross Geller was on his way to being popular.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for the feedback.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

Ross squirted the mousse in both hands and smoothed back his hair. Much better. He'd had three girls compliment his looks today. Three girls who didn't know he'd existed before he'd started going out with Rachel. Even though Ross hadn't orchestrated this plan to get popular, he had to admit that it was a nice fringe benefit. No one bothered him anymore. He could walk through the halls of Lincoln High without being called names or tripped.

"Ross, where are you headed off to looking so handsome?," his mother asked when he stepped into the living room. Ross was wearing a blue dress shirt with white pants and shoes. His slick backed hair completed the look. He was holding some flowers that he'd bought earlier that day. He wanted everything to be perfect because tonight something was happening that he had been looking forward to for a long time.

"He's going out with Rachel," Monica grinned. She was sitting at the coffee table playing Monopoly with their father. It was true. As part of the deal, Ross had negotiated two Saturday nights during the month that he and Rachel would spend together.

"Rachel Green? When did this happen?," his father asked, surprised.

"And that's not all," Monica added. "He's been sitting at _the_ cafeteria table at lunch. The table they won't even let _me_ anywhere near."

"Of course they won't let you near it. You're a nerd." Ross informed her heartlessly.

"It's like the Twilight Zone. I don't know what Rachel and all the others see in him all of a sudden. He's even ditched his old friends and only hangs around the popular crowd now," Monica went on. To Ross's relief, Rachel had apparently not told Monica about the deal. Ross and Monica had a fairly typical sibling relationship, and he'd never hear the end of it if she had this information to hold over him.

Ross started to protest Monica's words when his mother interrupted. "It doesn't surprise me a bit that the kids have finally come around to see what a wonderful boy our Ross is." She stopped for a second to straighten his collar.

"Aw, Mom." Ross was embarrassed. His parents always thought anything he did was just wonderful.

"Ross, before you go on this date, I think you and I had better have a little talk," his father said, the Monopoly game forgotten.

"Dad, no! We don't need to do that. I'm going to be late," Ross cried. His father meant well, but sometimes he was too blunt. It was mortifying the way he said certain things.

"Jack, not now," Mrs. Geller said.

"What? I just want to make sure he's prepared. Does he know what goes where?"

Ross headed out the door.

"Ross, wait!," his mother called. Ross paused in the threshold of the doorway.

"Be home by eleven. And take your father's car," she added, pressing the keys into his hand. Great. He wasn't sure if taking the pizzamobile was better than walking.

"And by the way, how are you enjoying your new model?"

In all the excitement of the past week, Ross had completely forgotten about the dinosaur model kit he was supposed to have bought.

"Just great, Mom. Thanks for the car!" He held up the keys and smiled.

* * *

><p>Ross chugged down the street to Rachel's house. It was only three blocks away, but the station wagon was so broken down that little kids on bicycles were passing him. Every now and then he'd forget and lean on the horn.<p>

By the time he reached Rachel's driveway, the car was making a rattling sound. It sputtered to a stop. Ross got out, reached in for the flowers and looked up at the second story window that was Rachel's bedroom. He saw the purple curtain part just a little and then close.

Ross had this date all planned out. He knew he was going to have to act fast if he stood any chance getting Rachel to fall for him, so he was pulling out all the stops. First, he had watched how the popular guys at school acted around girls. They weren't all nervous and shy like he was. They called the girls they liked "babe" and "honey." They drove shiny cars and took their dates to the most expensive restaurants. Even though he had very little money left after giving his life savings to Rachel, Ross was planning to take her to a fancy Italian place his parents always went to on their anniversary.

Rachel's younger sister Amy answered the door. She looked at Ross solemnly before saying. "My sister is waiting for you in her room. She wants to you come up as soon as possible."

"Wha-, sure," Ross said, confused. He had expected Rachel to answer the door. He followed Amy and Jill up to Rachel's room.

Ross knocked before entering. "You wanted to see me?" he asked hopefully as he opened the door.

Rachel was lying on her bed with her legs crossed filing her nails. She was wearing a pink nightgown. Her eyes were red-rimmed as if she'd been crying.

Rachel threw down the nail file. "Those brats. I told them to tell you I wasn't here." At that, Jill and Amy burst into laughter outside the door. Then they could hear their running feet pounding down the stairs.

"Why didn't you want me to know you were here? And why aren't you ready?" Ross asked. He wasn't going to be swayed by her tears this time. That was how he had gotten into this whole mess.

"Oh Ross, I just don't feel like going out." Rachel sat up in bed and turned away from him.

Ross set down the flowers on the vanity table. He was starting to get upset. "But it was part of the deal that we go out on dates!" he practically shouted. The most important part, really, though Rachel didn't know that.

"I know," Rachel said. She sighed. "I guess I do owe you an explanation. You know that guy I dated last year, Scott?"

Ross nodded. Big guy. Letter jacket. Not much upstairs.

"Well, he didn't call me all summer. I know I shouldn't have done it, but today I called him at his dorm. He answered, but when I started talking he hung up." Rachel's face scrunched up in pain as if she were reliving the event. It was obvious she wasn't used to getting rejected.

"Maybe something is wrong with the phone line." Without thinking about what he was doing, Ross sat next to Rachel on the bed. "That must be it."

"Maybe," Rachel was really crying now. "Do you really think that's it?" she looked up expectantly.

"Of course. I mean, of course this guy is thinking about you. How could he not? And if he doesn't call you, someone else will," Ross finished confidently.

Rachel sighed and twirled a strand of hair around her finger. "Ross, you're a man...almost. Tell me, if you dated a girl for three and a half months and promised to write and call after you left for college, what reason would you have for not doing that?"

Ross had to think for a minute because her question was so jumbled and she was talking so quickly it was hard to understand.

"Well, for one thing I would never do that," he said carefully. "I mean, not call or write when I said I was going to. Maybe someone who acts like that doesn't deserve you." Ross shifted uncomfortably and averted his eyes from Rachel's. He was sure she was going to get mad at him and accuse him of making a pass at her.

But when Ross finally looked up, Rachel was gazing at him, a slight smile playing on her lips. The only sound in the room was the ticking of a clock. They stayed like that, just looking at each other, for several minutes.

Suddenly a sharp knock on the door shattered the stillness in the room. "Rachel, I've told you a million times we don't allow boys in the bedrooms with the doors closed in this house!"

It was Rachel's father. Ross jumped off the bed as the door swung open.

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Don't make such a big deal, Daddy. It's just Ross."

Just Ross. Of course her father didn't need to worry because nothing would ever happen with just Ross.

"Well, according to your sisters, you've got some hot and heavy romance going with this boy." More giggles in the background. "I want you dressed and the both of you out of this room." He walked away, but not before leaving the door ajar.

* * *

><p>A few minutes later Ross and Rachel were sitting in the backyard in the lounge chairs by the pool. Even though it was unseasonably warm for late September, it was too cool to swim. And even though Rachel still wasn't in the mood to go out, she seemed to have changed her mind about fulfilling her contractual obligation to at least hang out with Ross tonight.<p>

After several minutes of silence, Ross decided to make small talk. "So what about _your_ college plans? Have you thought about it?"

"Not really," Rachel admitted. "I'm only in eleventh grade."

"The time goes by faster than you think," Ross warned. "When I was a junior I already new I was going to NYU."

"Yeah, but college is important to you. My parents think...Well, they're only paying for my college tuition because they think I'll find a smart man to marry that way."

"But is that what you want? I feel like I've been studying to be a paleontologist my whole life. Isn't there something like that you want to be?" Ross asked.

"Well, I mean, it's not like I'm a rocket scientist or something. I'm just a cheerleader. There's not much of a career in that."

"You can be anything you want to be," Ross said simply. From anyone else, it might've sounded like one of those public service announcements on Saturday morning TV, but Ross really believed what he was saying.

Rachel considered this for a moment. Then she stood up. "I'll be right back," she said in a soft voice. She returned a moment later holding a thick notebook.

She sat on the concrete ground at Ross's feet and paused. She looked hesitant. "I'm afraid you're going to laugh or think this is a really immature thing to do."

"Not if it's important to you I won't," Ross said seriously.

"Okay. These are just some looks I put together from different fashion magazines," Rachel opened the book to a page with a pasted together model in a bright red shirt and a plaid skirt. She flipped through several more pages. "See, shoulder pads are really in this season, but I don't think it's a trend that will last. They're pretty tacky." She looked up at Ross. "You're really not into this, are you?" she asked.

"It's...really not my thing," Ross stammered. He never thought very much about what he wore, but Rachel...she talked about clothes with a passion he'd never seen her express before. "Who's that?" he asked, pointing to a close up photograph of a girl who looked like Rachel, but not quite.

"Oh," Rachel seemed a little embarrassed. "That's me with Christie Brinkley's nose and Cindy Crawford's mouth. I'm getting a nose job as soon as I turn 18."

"You don't need to do that. Don't you pay attention on all those field trips we take to the Met? No artist wants to paint a picture of some girl with a boring, square nose. Look at Madame X, or Athena, or Modigliani's paintings. Those subjects had such a quiet dignity about them. They wouldn't have been as interesting with another nose." Ross's face lit up more and more as he talked.

Rachel smiled and shook her head. "So you really like museums and history and stuff, huh? How come?"

Ross shrugged, suddenly embarrassed. "Why do you like fashion?"

Rachel's eyes took on a dreamy look. "You can change who you are when you change your look. You can be whoever you want to be."

"Who are you, really?" The words escaped his mouth before he could stop them. Now she would probably laugh at him and tell all her friends what a dork he was. Who but Ross would sit around on a Saturday night asking questions like that?

But instead Rachel looked down at her crossed legs. Maybe she didn't know how to answer. It suddenly occurred to Ross that he really had no idea why he loved Rachel. He just did. Before today, he wouldn't have been able to come up with many good qualities that she possessed besides the fact that he was attracted to her. But right now, he had to at least try.

"You're loyal to your friends," Ross blurted out, thinking of Monica. "You have the ability to make most people like you. That," Ross admitted, "is a quality I would like to have. And I think you have the drive and determination to work in the fashion field someday if you really worked at it."

Rachel looked at him intently. "You really believe that, don't you?"

Ross returned her gaze. "Yes, I really do. Show me the rest of your book?" he asked.

* * *

><p>Some time later Ross looked at his watch. It was already close to midnight. "Well, I'd better get going before my parents send someone over here. You know how they are."<p>

"Do you really have to go?" Rachel found herself saying. She didn't know why. She'd been dreading this day all week.

"Yeah, I'd better," said Ross, walking backwards toward the side gate. He stumbled over his feet, nearly falling down. So much for his plan to be smooth. As they talked tonight, he had totally forgotten he was supposed to act cool. Now he only had one more date to try and make Rachel fall in love with him.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for reading!<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

"So tell me about you and Ross," Monica demanded, taking a large bag of Skittles out of her overnight bag.

"I thought you didn't want to hear about it. You said it was gross," Rachel lay on her bed looking down at the other girl.

"I don't mean like _that_," Monica said between crunches of her candy. "No lurid details please. But if you really, really like him, we might be sisters someday!"

Rachel pulled at a loose thread on her bedspread. How had this whole thing gotten so out of hand? She hadn't meant to deceive Monica in all of this, or get her hopes up about someday becoming sisters.

"What can I say?," Rachel answered as honestly as she could. "Ross isn't nearly as bad as I thought."

* * *

><p>For the most part, this was true. The night she had shown Ross her fashion notebook had made her see him in a different light. No one had ever before seriously listened to her hopes and dreams without wanting something in return. Something, Rachel thought wryly, like getting her into bed, or the back of a car. All the boys thought she was fast. But Ross was different. He didn't seem to care one way or the other. He was interested in Rachel as a person.<p>

But there were other times, like the next day at school during lunch, when Rachel found Ross simply insufferable. His temporary brush with popularity had definitely gone to his head.

"I'm taking all AP classes this year, as usual," Ross was bragging to all Rachel's friends. They were sitting at the table in the middle of the cafeteria like always. Rachel absently stirred her mashed potatoes as Ross talked. He'd been prattling on like this all lunch period. "I'm getting college credits so I'll probably graduate early."

No one was paying Ross much attention. College wasn't such a hot topic among this group. Most of the guys were going somewhere on a football scholarship and based their decision about which school to attend on how close to the beach it was. The only one who appeared to be listening to Ross was Chip. He drummed his fingers on the surface of the table, glaring at Ross as he spoke.

"Well, maybe you're too cool to sit at this table with all of us dumbasses," Chip growled. Everyone looked up, stunned. A hush fell over the table. Ross stopped talking. His heart pounded in his ears. No one had spoken that way to him since he had started dating Rachel.

Rachel's head snapped up. She put down her spoon and looked directly into Chip's eyes. "If Ross goes, I go too," she challenged him.

Chip crumpled his napkin, threw it on the table and stalked out of the cafeteria. No one was going to tell Rachel Green she had to sit somewhere else. Everyone went back to their lunches.

Ross finally regained the ability to speak. "Rachel, I've never seen you that way before," he said with admiration.

"Maybe I've never had to be that way before," Rachel reasoned. She looked around and saw that no one was listening to them. "But you really shouldn't try so hard to impress everyone. Remember how I took the ring to the party? That was me trying to impress people. It really got me into a lot of trouble."

Ross looked down.

"No offense, of course," Rachel flipped her long brown hair over her shoulder. "This really hasn't been so bad after all, but you need to just be yourself. No more of this fake stuff, okay?"

Ross thought for a minute. Does this mean she actually likes him when he's being himself? "Okay," he agreed.

* * *

><p>"Ross!," Will huffed when he finally caught up with his friend after school. "Didn't you hear me calling you?"<p>

The fact was, Ross had heard Will when he tried to get his attention in the hallway after eighth period. He had managed to lose himself in the crowd and duck out the front door of the school and down the sidewalk before Will had finally caught up to him.

It wasn't that Ross didn't want to see Will, exactly. It was true that they hadn't hung out in several weeks because Ross was usually with Rachel, and Will didn't want to go near _her_. But Rachel had cheerleading practice this afternoon and still Ross found himself avoiding his friend. Ross sighed. He guessed he didn't want to be reminded of his old life. The old life that included sitting around sneering at the popular group, yet desperately wanting their approval at the same time. It all seemed so pathetic now.

"I guess I didn't," Ross answered now, shuffling his feet on the pavement.

"What about poker tomorrow tonight? Can you make it?" Will, Ross and a few of the other boys from the marching band used to play poker together every Saturday night. Before Ross was popular.

"Well, you see. I can't. I have a date," Ross was somewhat smug. There was no use trying to hide it.

"With _her_ again, I assume," Will said stiffly.

Ross didn't deny it.

"That's _twice_ you've backed out of our games to be with her," Will accused. "We had a pact! You are out of the club!" The chubby boy stalked off with as much dignity as he could muster. It wasn't until he was a block away that Ross even remembered what club he was talking about.

* * *

><p>Ross was sweating when he arrived at Rachel's house that night for their second (and last) date. The air condition in his father's car didn't work and the temperature had been into the nineties today. It had cooled off a little with nightfall, but the air was still so humid that Ross's shirt was sticking to his skin.<p>

'Just be cool,' Ross chanted to himself as he walked up the cement walkway. Rachel didn't like it when he showed off. She wanted him to be himself, so tonight he wasn't going to try to dazzle her by throwing money around. He wasn't exactly sure what they were going to do, but he wanted to make the most of this one last date.

Rachel was starting to like him better. He could feel it. Not only had she stood up for him at lunch, but she wasn't complaining as much about being forced to go out with him. She wasn't talking down to him anymore, but had begun treating him almost as a friend.

* * *

><p>"There's no way I'm getting in that car. What if someone sees us?" Rachel protested when she saw the vehicle Ross had arrived in. He'd washed it before he came over, but the car was still the same old rusted, spray-painted heap of metal. "I'm serious about this Ross. This wasn't a part of the deal."<p>

"Fine, then we'll walk." Ross wasn't letting her out of the date that easy.

"Walk where? There's nothing that way!" Rachel shouted as Ross began strolling towards the end of the street. They lived on a dead end street, and beyond the cul-de-sac was just some woods in front of a large clearing. She, Monica and Ross used to play there as children, but so much time had gone by that Rachel had almost forgotten that the place existed.

Feeling very much like the victim in a horror movie, Rachel had no choice but to follow Ross through the woods.

"Isn't this amazing?" Ross exclaimed when they'd made it to the clearing, waving his arms around. Nature made him hyper.

"What part of it is amazing, Ross? The part where you dragged me here against my will on a Saturday night? Or the part where you want to drive me in that ugly, old car in the hundred degree heat?"

"Just trying to make the best of things," Ross was subdued.

Rachel's expression softened. If she were with any other boy right now, she'd be suspicious of why he'd brought her out here like this. But Ross was so different from the other guys. He was so sweet and gentle and dorky that it probably wouldn't even cross his mind to try to put the moves on her.

"So what now?" Rachel asked. She looked off into the dark, hilly distance dotted with lights. You could see most of the town from here.

"Why don't we just sit and look at the stars?" Ross suggested. He sat on the ground and looked up at Rachel expectantly.

"The stars, huh? Nice line," Rachel snickered, although she knew Ross was sincere. "Sit on the grass?"

"Yeah, why not?" Ross held up his hand. Rachel took it and hesitantly lowered herself onto the dry grass.

She opened her purse and took out a stick of cherry chap stick. As she smoothed it over her lips, Ross couldn't help staring. No matter how awful Rachel could be, he was undeniably mesmerized by her.

Rachel caught him looking and gave him an apologetic smile. "I'd offer you some, but I'm almost out."

"Oh, that's okay," Ross mumbled.

"So you wanted to look at the stars. What's there to see?" Rachel lay back on the ground and folded her arms behind her head. "Isn't it true that the stars we see today are actually thousands of years old?"

"Actually only a few are that far away. I don't really know a lot about astronomy, though. Maybe I should. I might find my home planet." Ross chuckled to himself, but it was obvious that he didn't think it was very funny.

"Oh Ross, you're not that bad," Rachel rolled her eyes, but she was smiling.

"I'm really not?" Ross asked, lying down too.

"No. Everybody really seems to like you. Even with all the dinosaur and college talk." As Rachel spoke, some crickets began chirping in the background. For a few minutes, that was the only sound while Ross let Rachel's words sink in.

"But that's only because I was with you. After today things will go back to normal." Ross was not looking forward to reclaiming his geek status.

"Not necessarily. You're my protégé after all. I must have taught you _something_."

Ross grinned. He couldn't help it. He slowly leaned over Rachel. He felt her breath on him as he neared her. Her eyes widened in surprise as Ross came closer. Suddenly she shoved him back. "Ross, remember the rules!"

"What? I wasn't going to kiss you. I needed chap stick!" Ross quickly came up with an explanation. "Man, it's a dry day! Are you hot?"

"Never mind, Ross. Let's just stay here for a little while, okay?" Rachel edged over a little just to be on the safe side.

Ross was elated. "Sure!" Rachel wanted to be with him. She had volunteered to prolong the date. Maybe Ross's plan had worked out after all.

* * *

><p>"We need to talk about how we're going to break up," Rachel said after a while. She leaned on one elbow.<p>

Ross's heart sank. How could she? Yes, their deal included a break up after one month, but he'd thought they were making progress. Being himself wasn't so smart after all.

Ross sat up so Rachel wouldn't see how upset he was. "How do you want to do it?" he asked in a resigned tone. He might as well give in.

"I think we need to make a big public spectacle at school so everyone will hear," Rachel answered as if she'd been thinking about it for a while. She'd probably been counting down the days, Ross thought ruefully.

"So you're going to dump me in front of the whole school. That sounds like fun," Ross said sarcastically.

"Let's make it more of a mutual thing," Rachel replied.

"Yeah, like anyone will believe that," Ross muttered. He had to face it. The jig was up. Being Rachel's boyfriend had been nice while it lasted.

* * *

><p>Being with a nice, normal boy like Ross had been nice while it lasted, Rachel thought as Ross walked her home. But she was tired of lying to everyone. She and Ross could certainly never be a <em>real<em> couple. They were too different.

"Look, I know this month has probably been like a nightmare for you," Ross said once they had reached Rachel's front door. "But you've probably guessed that it was a dream come true for me." Ross was unaccustomed to being so transparent about his feelings for Rachel, but he figured they would go back to the way things had been before after Monday anyway, with Rachel barely acknowledging him when she was over to see Monica or when they saw each other in the school hallways.

"It hasn't been so bad." Rachel wished she could find other words to use to describe the experience, but "not so bad" were the best she could come up with.

Rachel suddenly had an idea. She dug into her purse and took out the tube of chap stick. "Here," she said quickly, shoving it into his hand. "A souvenir." She opened the door and quickly disappeared inside the house.

Ross stared at the empty tube of chap stick. He felt like a real jerk. All that effort into getting Rachel to like him had come to nothing. Ross walked towards his car with his head down and his hands in his pockets. Then suddenly a happier thought occurred to him. He'd lost Rachel, but at least maybe he could try to hold on to his popularity.


End file.
